Postage Stamp

Oh you are not certain about stamps are you? They come with Elvis, snowflakes, and Tweety. They just don't come down in price. Ever. Sometimes if I was a super leet yet nerdy kind of person... not to name names Horatio Hornblower.... I would collect lots and lots of them and put them in big moldering books for safe storage --physical and temporal mind you. Then I'd wonder on vacation if my home were being robbed and all my precious collectibles being fenced on e-bay. Thoughts would turn to natural disasters such as locusts, glue eating moths, and Lothar of the Hill people bounding out of the woods to ransack, burn and defecate in my abode. Of course he'd be doubled over with laughter and mirth as he ran back into the woods with my stamp collection under his hairy arms. That's the kind of pressure I don't think I could handle. Stamps are not for me. Plus everytime I buy some I have to go back like a week later and buy 200 two cent stamps so I can have the mail use me again. One thing maybe missing though... scratch-n-sniff stamps. Those I may just go for. Especially in the basement. Put up like a whole wall or walls of stamps and then turn on some Black Flagg, drop acid and thrash myself to death against their sickly sweet smell. Now that's a Friday night. Or maybe I'd use two expensive stamps on one envelope and just waste them that way. Drive those penny pinchers mad it will. Course in this day and age maybe a cost-benefit-analysis of stamp based clothing is in order. I mean how much COULD it really cost to jump out of the shower without toweling off and slather on a bunch of stamp books instead of clothes. It'd be sanitary, clean, and bio-degrable stamps are good for the environment. Win win win! Matter of fact...

FTW! Wear stamps. Hell lets get wild. Fund the war effort with stamps. Do it today. Be part of the solution. Wear War Stamps!