Watching paint dry is way under appreciated. It's an art form. Not like anybody can just sit there and watch it. Nope, these days they'd have to be taking pharmaceutical pushed attention controlling, why in the hell aren't they illegal; but wait they are making the right people lots of money... type of substances. Grass is a whole different thing. Grass at least usually has sunshine, a breeze, some ants, birds, maybe a squirrel or annoying little dog defecating in it. Altogether way too easy for those endowed with short attention spans to really feel a sense of accomplishment for toughing it out and watching it all happen. No, paint is where it's it. It's slow. It's usually completely uniform, and genuinely boring. The kind of attributes you want for a sea-turtle, your commute, or your accountant. Hair dressers rejoice. You will not be singled out. Not by me at least. Not this time. Don't Panic. Your time will come. For now you'll have to console yourself by rereading the guide.
Oh, that black ship you see. You don't. Not anymore, not now. I've got me some REAL paint.
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